And here I am in a hotel beside the airport. Our room is littered with middle school paraphernalia, by which I mean hair stuff, wet bathing suits, and a million socks. Girls are running down the hall. After having pretend chicken fights in the whirlpool, the children are consuming five large pizzas. One of them has borrowed the shoes off my feet and vanished. Fortunately here she comes, bouncing out of the elevator, ready to return them. But oh, look: she accidentally dropped them in the bathtub. She's very sorry. Well, not very but adequately. And now she needs to go eat more pizza.