On yesterday's poem
I am of course so honored by your pleasure in the poem. Thank you, everyone.
Carlene, I've spent many an hour, over the years (and many of them with our mutual friend Baron), mulling this glowering Puritan cloud. Still, I'm not convinced that it's not salutary in some way . . . and as the contorted negative in my sentence indicates, my thoughts about the need to seek joy or to accept preordained failures are thorny and require many mixed metaphors. That's where the poems come in, apparently: articulations without answers.
Mary, the curve was so interesting to me! The poem demanded a rhyme scheme, but I could not keep it within the bounds of a regular line cadence. The lines seemed to push themselves forward as the poem's emotions intensified. So then I started experimenting with the shape, and that's when the rhymes and lines fell into place. To me it looks a bit like a drawing of plot action. But it might also imitate a curved road.
Jen and Christopher, I'm curious about your reactions to the narrative voice. You write "put us there with you" and "women in tired cars," but the poem itself says, "You, not man enough . . . " and plays with prince imagery. My question is: am I being unclear? My intent was to imply that the "you" is male. But if that isn't coming through, I need to do more work.